But still, to actually see it was somewhat different. He, or actually she, seemed rather tall to Rachael, and looked somewhat old. That last observati...n made her frown, wondering if she really was that old. She'd always thought that she looked rather young for her age, but now.......now her body just looked so.....old, so mature, so authoritative and.....motherly. Rachael wasn't sure exactly how that made her feel. Martin glanced over at his Mom again, thinking how strange it was to think. "I fell in love."Katsuhito leaned forwards smiling, obviously entranced."One of you're fellow students?" He asked diplomatically."Worse! One of the professors!" She brought up her hands, vigorously rubbing her face."It's just so god awful when you think about it! Like some bad Sojo or harlequin romance!You look back, hear all the corny crap you said to each other! Think of all the stupid mistakes!It almost makes you wan'na laugh your ass off!" She stopped, her smile turning tragic."Almost...". "What are you going to do?" "Well, I should probably head out, but I'm way too tired. That doesn't mean I should stay, though," I replied, closing my eyes and pushing him away."That hasn't stopped you before," he said, cunningly. I sighed as I lead the way to the living room. "I know, and that's the problem. I know I'm going to do it before I even do it." I stopped beside the couch and felt Seth come up behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed the fabric between my shoulder. I find myself screaming on the inside, unable to break free of my pain. I wear a mask of contentment that grows weaker; my smile however happy it may appear is a charade- a fake twitch of the muscles for my audience. I feel angry, I feel unworthy, I feel caged and I feel empty. These emotions make me want to break free — to leave this life in search of another for nothing I or anyone else does makes me feel truly happy and conflict free. To fill the gap I harbour in my soul seems pointless —.
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